The Monkeybagel Analogy

I found this little gem somewhere on the Internet several years ago, and it's since been a favorite of mine -- if for no other reason that it is frequently all too true...

The Role of the Engineer: The Monkeybagel Analogy

The role of Engineer in a project unburdened by a requirement for architectural forethought is to link the designs of the Manager to Euclidean space-time, execute them with sinister grace, and to deliver the finished project to the Manager with concomitant documentation so that the changes may be incorporated coherently into the master plan. An illustrative simplification of this process follows:

Manager: Hey, I bought us a monkey! Let's stick him in a bagel and then he'll do our taxes!

Engineer: A monkey will not fit in a bagel. [demonstrates]

Manager: Hmm. We need to fold the monkey.

Engineer: I'd like to hear more about the taxes bit.

Manager: Taxes! Monkeybagels do taxes in an hour!

Engineer: Ah, I see what you mean!

Manager: Yes! Tax-doing monkeybagels!

Engineer: May I borrow that monkey?

Engineer returns in three days, tired, bitter, and covered in monkey poo. The monkey is wearing a tiny green visor, munching a bagel, and auditing 1099s.

Engineer: Here's the monkey. He likes pumpernickel. I'm gonna get a latte.

Manager: We did it! Monkeybagels for everyone!

Customer: Here's a big bucket of money! Will your monkeybagels wash a dog? We need fresh-scrubbed puppies for underwater welding!

Manager: [buys a schnauzer and some Brillo pads]